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The Daily Spud - NEWS - on discord https://discord.com/channels/820962964391198741/11236309348314154

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Comments

  • StylishNaadia (INT1)StylishNaadia (INT1) INT1 Posts: 42
    edited 04.06.2015
    Farmer Nadia here reporting from Astro Shining:
    The other day, BigFarmers saw a strange scene from the windows of their houses... Harry Potter flew to the BigFarm on Buckbeak along with Luna Lovegood and landed straight at the tip of the Water Tower. Buckbeak then toppled over the top and came rolling to land on the spiky roof of the Barn. All three got lots of blemishes and blisters but Buckbeak couldn't stop over there and fell further down right into the puddle of fresh and hot cow poop. All soaked in thick smelly dung, Harry Potter had just managed to raise his head, that Luna, in her attempt to help out with her Cleaning Charm, sent him flying across the cowshed landing in the puddle of fresh pig poop, face down.

    Rumors are that Lord Voldemort has been chasing Harry Potter from across the Flower Farm to the Viking Island to the Horse Ranch and finally to the Main Farm, on the stolen, broken broom of Ronald Weasley. Some even bet that they saw Lord Voldemort hiding inside the Greenhouse waiting for Harry Potter to emerge from the various pools of poops.

    We'll keep you updated on this....
    You heard this first on the Daily Spud!
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 04.06.2015
    Good evening ladies and gentlemen, this is farmerjohn reporting to you LIVE from the green carpet outside the Forum Awards where players will be recognized for their outstanding performances in the Forum. Ah, I can see Larino making her way through the crowd now! She is a vision of loveliness in a gold strapless flowing gown by Versace accented by her diamond tiara and matching Louis Vitton bag and heels! Following not far behind her is Jiesta and Gwendolen. Always considered fashion risk takers, they won't disappoint their fans today! While Gwendolen goes for the casual t-shirt and jeans look, Jiesta appears relaxed and at home in her overalls by Osh Kosh accented by her knee high muck boots in vintage camo. A look both classic and timeless! Oh, I can now see Juk coming this way! A virtual unknown until recently, Juk has quickly become a household word in the Big Farm Community. Expect more from this player in the future! Now I see the ever popular Briannospam approaching elegantly dressed in a green silk tuxedo by Armani. Move over, George Clooney! Bringing up the rear is the darling of Big Farm, Dara! Her marigold yellow sundress is to die for! As they all enter the Colliseum to accept their awards for their achievements, let us pause for a moment and reflect on what these individuals have accomplished. There is no higher calling in the game than to help your fellow players, and the ones chosen to receive this honor have proven to ALL of us that they have what it takes to be the BEST! This has been farmerjohn coming to you live from the green carpet. :thumbsup:
  • Pingo42Pingo42 Posts: 537
    edited 04.06.2015
    Loved reading about the Forum award ceremony, Farmerjohn! The fashion commentary was priceless!

    What will our Daily Spud editor wear to the award ceremony when his turn comes, I wonder .....? ;)
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 04.06.2015
    Pingo42 wrote: »
    What will our Daily Spud editor wear to the award ceremony when his turn comes, I wonder .....? ;)

    Thank you Pingo! Like many progressive farmers, I prefer the J.C. Penney look! graphics-people-033859.gif
  • Jiesta (NL1)Jiesta (NL1) Posts: 6,557
    edited 04.06.2015
    Wow FarmerJohn - this green carpet life coverage is priceless (although I am more a glamerous gown girl); absolutely priceless!! Loved reading it! :thumbsup:
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 04.06.2015
    Jiesta wrote: »
    (although I am more a glamorous gown girl);

    My apologies, Jiesta! As they say, "A STAR is born!" smiley-shocked003.gif graphics-women-831770.gif
  • jess_d (US1)jess_d (US1) US1 Posts: 3,515
    edited 04.06.2015
    Awesome news coverage farmerjohn! I really enjoyed reading about the forum awards ceremony.

    You deserve an award for your awesome reporting. trcp.gif~original
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 05.06.2015
    jess_d wrote: »
    You deserve an award for your awesome reporting. trcp.gif~original

    Thank you, jess! That means a lot to me, especially coming from someone who has helped so many players that they deserve their own statue! graphics-antiquity-139723.gif
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 05.06.2015
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    CLEAR AND SUNNY!.......and SCHOOL'S OUT!! graphics-school-997993.gif


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  • cabo (INT1)cabo (INT1) Posts: 360
    edited 06.06.2015
    Thank you FarmerJohn for the Forum Award Ceremony! Very entertaining--as are all your articles.

    One question: Where was Pinjo?
    My guess, was too busy tidying up the forum to make it to the Green Carpet.
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 06.06.2015
    One question: Where was Pinjo?
    My guess, was too busy tidying up the forum to make it to the Green Carpet.

    Oh, he was there alright, Caroline! As you know, Pinjo prefers to work behind the scenes. This time as my cameraman!graphics-cameraman-446709.gif
    He got some great footage! Have a look! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sS0AiOs_7aA
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 06.06.2015
    Good mornin' everybody! My name is Jebediah Schmuck, a long time farmer in these parts. Thought y'all might wanna know what a day on a Big Farm is really like. Just foller me! Over here, you'll see the doghouse. My dog Booger lives there. BEST dog I ever had! Doesn't poop, and he digs up pigs by the thousands! You see, in Big Farm the pigs do quite well living underground. Who knew!? To your left, you'll see a large area filled with all sorts of decorations, sort of like a bizarre theme park. That's to make my workers happy. You'd think that building them a house would be good enough, but noooooooo, not here! That big building out in the field there? Oh, that's the Library. That's for the rich folk with all their fancy schmancy edgy-cation. I'm a simple farmer that don't need all that. I come from a long and distinguished line of Schmucks! My daddy was a Schmuck, as was his daddy, and on and on. Now lets mosey over to my horse ranch. Raisin' horses is tricky stuff, but I'm gettin' to be an old hand at it. Just look at this beautiful animal! Glossy coat, nicely muscled front and hind quarters, and a nice disposition. Too bad he's as slow as mollasses in wintertime! Ain't even worth the gas to take him to compete! I'd offer to cook you some some ribs on my barbecue, but they kinda frown on that around here. Well, I'm surely glad you folks could drop by and pay me a visit! If y'all had a good time here, come on back and I'll show ya more of what being a Big Farmer really means! Adios! 8o
  • jess_d (US1)jess_d (US1) US1 Posts: 3,515
    edited 06.06.2015
    Thank you, jess! That means a lot to me, especially coming from someone who has helped so many players that they deserve their own statue! graphics-antiquity-139723.gif

    Awww, thank you so much! I love it :D
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 08.06.2015
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    CLEAR AND SUNNY!......... And HOT! So stay close to your fan! graphics-weather-471938.gif


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  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 11.06.2015
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    CLEAR AND SUNNY!.......with a few cotton candy clouds! graphics-smilies-190735.gif


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  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 12.06.2015
    The Daily Spud News has unlimited openings for reporters! If anyone wants to report a story of the goings on in Big Farm, just jump right in! I know for a fact that we have a great many creative people in our Forum. So what are you waiting for? Write a story! You'll have lots of FUN while honing your writing skills! What more can you ask for? So become a Daily Spud reporter today! Thanks, everyone!
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  • freerange (US1)freerange (US1) Posts: 135
    edited 13.06.2015
    Killer Robot Attack?

    Poor overly excitable Bathing Betty has had another scare on the farm. She came screaming into the Candy Caravan earlier this morning convinced she was coming under attack by killer robots. "They're bent on destruction and they're everywhere!" she shrieked. " I brought my children here for a fun vacation and now we are being pelted by multicolored grapeshot! Mrs. Landry quickly stuffed some cotton candy into her mouth before the panic could spread and explained to her about the function of gumball machines. There was a secondary moment of excitement when it was revealed that the frightening machines cost $29,000 but eventually the power of sugary sweets took over. Bathing Betty was last seen reclining in a dazed state beneath the alpaca tent waving at the cotton candy machines and mumbling something about yellow elephants.
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 13.06.2015
    Great story, freerange! I think we'll find a lot of odd things happening on the Candy farm! graphics-balloons-315374.gif Welcome back to "The Daily Spud"!
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 13.06.2015
    Like a true reporter, I found myself roaming around the Candy farm and the County Fair looking for a scoop. And boy, did I ever find one! I ran into a real indian chief! He said his name was Chief Chewemup of the Sweetahatchee tribe. Since all the indian villages I saw on the Candy farm were deserted, I asked him where his people went. He told me they had all moved away because of an evil spirit in the form of a monster! Being a bit skeptical, I traveled East to a small indian village on the banks of a river. The village was deserted as I expected. Walking along the bank of the river, I noticed a large hole. When I peered into it, I was shocked to see red glowing eyes and a mouthful of fangs staring back at me! I've heard stories of this same creature on the Island farm and the Viking farm, but I never expected to run into the "cave creature" on the Candy farm! No wonder the natives were frightened away! Something needs to be done about this beast! I'll keep you updated on this story. You heard it here first at "The Daily Spud"!

    It's not a Myth! It's a MONSTER! graphics-monster-725273.gif
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 16.06.2015
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    CLEAR AND SUNNY!........here and in Florida! graphics-sunbathing-059988.gif


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  • Lily Ellie Anne (GB1)Lily Ellie Anne (GB1) Posts: 1,331
    edited 21.06.2015
    I love this! ;)
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 24.06.2015
    Upon hearing that there is now a Candy farm, dentists from all over the world are now converging on the Big Farm community! I spoke with one of these dentists, and when asked why, he had this to say: "A Candy Palace?", he said, grinning widely, "It's a dentist's dream come true!"
    "Cavities will be rampant among your farmers!" "I'll make a BUNDLE because I specialize in GOLD fillings!" As he drove away in his Rolls Royce, I wondered whether anyone ever expected there would be such a huge demand for dental services. Hmmmm......do you suppose that the company will foot the bill for our dental care? Don't hold your breath! And brush and floss at least once a day! This is farmerjohn reporting for "The Daily Spud". :)


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  • freerange (US1)freerange (US1) Posts: 135
    edited 24.06.2015
    ahahaha gold fillings :D
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 25.06.2015
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    CLEAR AND SUNNY!........and tomorrow will be...graphics-3d-smileys-927230.gif CLEAR AND SUNNY!
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  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 27.06.2015
    Ladies, are you tired of the dreary day to day chore of cleaning your cache? Now you don't have to! Just call us! The Cache Cow Cleaning Service is now open for business! Let our friendly and courteous staff of highly-trained immigrants do the work for you! You'll be free to enjoy life again! And your cache will be so clean you could eat off it! So what are you waiting for?
    Call The Cache Cow Cleaning Service today! 8o

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  • Jiesta (NL1)Jiesta (NL1) Posts: 6,557
    edited 27.06.2015
    FarmerJohn, you're hilarious!!! 5278.gif
  • FilipeczekFilipeczek Posts: 275
    edited 27.06.2015
    That's funny! :D I agree about the dentists especially, ha :rolleyes:
  • farmerjohn 22 (US1)farmerjohn 22 (US1) US1 Posts: 37,770
    edited 27.06.2015
    Being a inquisitive person, I've always wondered about the Flower farm. Here you have this flower shop waaaay out in the middle of nowhere and it doesn't even have a parking lot. That's because it doesn't need one. It has no customers! Yet this flower shop rakes in millions of dollars every week! How is this possible? Good management? I don't think so! I'm beginning to suspect that the Flower farm is all just a front for a major money laundering operation! And I'm involved!!!!! What has this company gotten me mixed up in here?! In fact, it may not even be my farm at all. It could belong to a cartel! And those guys don't play!!!! So now when I go to the Flower farm, I just take my piece of the action and go. I don't hang around. That's just asking for trouble!!! ;(

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  • Ria_ ()Ria_ () Posts: 280
    edited 27.06.2015
    I'm afraid it's not just the flower farm. My dog regularly finds big amounts of cash hidden in the main farm. Who hides cash in the yard? Highly suspicious behavior. Is Captain barnacle involved?
  • RunsWivScissors (GB1)RunsWivScissors (GB1) GB1 Posts: 6,633
    edited 27.06.2015
    I have always suspected Monica to be behind the BF money laundering, she shows up at my farm with a car full of cash & "innocently" offers to exchange it for gold, if thats not some dodgy dealing I don`t know what is! :S
    I have also noticed that she seems to be closely followed by Steve, either they are having an affair or he is in on this too.
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